The history of Helen

Helen was having lunch, actually brunch, w/ my bff, Luquisha, one day and she suggested she start a fictional blog! The characters may be based on real life characters...but the honesty of what's true and untrue will be for the reader to determine. The character's name is Helen, as it is a private joke amongst her college friends and a club that once existed ~ The Helen Club. The Helen Club is now the Pirate Club of Ponte Vedra. Further info re. both to be revealed later. Helen is a single parent with four children to raise on her own. It is a handful for her! She loves her children more than life itself. Helen's x husband, Dick, just remarried a buxom blonde named Helenth, but Helen and Dick's children call her Cruella Deville. She didn't attend college, has a DUI record, along with a felony record for stealing beef jerky from the In & Out store! Dick failed to think to tell his four children before he had the lavish ceremony where his best friend Rick walked Helenth down the isle. Her x boyfriend from her hometown in Big Orange Country,Biff, broke up w/ her for someone he met and fell in love with overnight on EHarmony. GO FIGURE!! He broke up w/ her via text message the same day her x husband told her he planned to marry Helenth (she's the buxom blonde who Helen's wonderful children think has had entirely toooooo much plastic surgery and Helen's 10 year old Suzie corrects her English because she puts prepositions at the end of her sentences..."Where'd y'all eat dinner at"...). So many people told Helen she should write a book... or wear a "Helencam" on her head for a reality TV series...that she decided to write a blog. So what's true and untrue about this blog...anything and everything for both! Anything goes. Now I need to read the blog rules before I tell you anymore about Helen. Dammit Janet